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I know someone who worries so much that she frequently makes herself sick. Sometimes it’s over things worth worrying about but most times not. If her husband says ‘I’ll see you in a little bit’ she is mildly flipped out in thirty minutes, and totally gone in an hour. Even after he shows up she’ll have an upset stomach. Stress, obviously, is not kind to her.
I can remember doing the same thing to myself once when I was a kid and my dad hadn’t come home yet. He was very late, and my mom was very panicked. The ensuing argument when he did finally arrive home was worse than the worry, and I resolved then and there to keep unnecessary worry to a minimum.
On D’s recent trip to Peoria he failed to call me one night. I thought enough about it to realize he hadn’t called and then let it go and went back to my everyday. In contrast I will lay awake at night wondering if I remembered to lock the truck and unless I get up and check I will not go back to sleep. My night-brain is a much bigger worrier than my day-brain. It ferrets out the most wondrous things to worry about, and if my day-brain tells it to ‘shut up and go to sleep’ night-brain simply inserts those worries into my dreams. The house burns down (I left the iron plugged in), the dog gets hit by a car (I failed to let her in), the truck gets broken into (this happened once, and yes, I forgot to lock the door) and so forth.
Day-brain does some unnecessary worrying too, but where night-brain will chase it in a circle all night, day-brain checks it out and moves on. Worried as I start the car at the gas station that I’ve left the pump nozzle in or the gas cap off? Check the rear view mirror - done. Worried that I might not have locked the front door and I’m already at work? Screw it, that’s what insurance is for – done. Worried the last donut will latch onto my thighs? Eat it - done. Day-brain just doesn’t have time to tote night-brain’s baggage around. Day-brain has stuff to do!
Have I accomplished the childhood promise to reduce unnecessary worry? Night-brain says ‘no’, day-brain say ‘get a grip’!